I wish I know what can I do to make you fall for me again.
I wish we could fall in love again.
Can we, babe?
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Friday, December 4, 2009
Moody Day or Whatever That Is..
Today was a bad day. Nt yet a disaster day. Yesterday I slept at 2.30am and I guessed I didn't have enough sleep though I slept till 10.30am. Went to college for classes till 3pm then went to Padang with my gang. I didn't eat much or should I say I didn't even buy any food. All I ordered was a cup of coconut drink as I don't feel well today.
Came back home, did the laundry, thinking of should I go to the celebration. At last I didn't go. You went. I don't know what happened to me. Maybe we're getting more like strangers, getting further. It's like I don't know who you are anymore and you don't know me. Everything is coming to an end. These two days didn't see you, I don't know how to describe my feeling. I was happy at first as finally I can have some time for myself, finally I can rest at home and finally I can be alone. Today it felt the same. Just I feel something's strange. Feeling weird to spend my afternoon at home. Feeling weird of doing what I used to do last time. Everything just doesn't seemed right. I don't know why, maybe it's because I'm used to spending my days with you.
I had been struggling with myself for the past few weeks. I keep thinking, what's best for both of us. What's best for you, best for me. I admit, I don't love you like I did before. I don't trust you like I used to. And I know you couldn't have loved me better since that incident. I tried to convince myself, tried to pull it back... I'm tired and I'm fed up. Today I had been cold to you, I wanted to just ignore you, yet I can't do it. Maybe you don't know me well, maybe you don't understand me yet, or maybe you've been taking me for granted, for whatever reasons that are, I'm fed up. I'm annoyed by my own attitudes. I hate myself. I hate everything. Sometimes, I hate you for being so childish and so mean. I bet you don't know the way you reply me, I hate it. When I saw how you reply others and it was so different, it's wordless to describe how i feel. What have I done? Does anyone really love me and try to understands me besides my parents?
I feel sorry towards myself, towards you, and most importantly, towards my parents. This whole year had been a busy year till I did not really spend time with my parents. I feel sorry to them. I should love them more than any others as they love me more than they love themselves. No matter who's your partner, parents should always come first.
Why I will have thought like this? I bet most of you watch 2012. You could see that the parents put their children first in everything. They are even willing to die as long as their children are safe. Come to think of it, my parents have spent half century on earth already, how long more I could talk to them, spend time with them, hang out with them, tease them, look at them, etc..? IF 2012 the day is true, maybe we will be the lucky survivors, maybe not... So try not to waste your time anymore. There's no more time.
Came back home, did the laundry, thinking of should I go to the celebration. At last I didn't go. You went. I don't know what happened to me. Maybe we're getting more like strangers, getting further. It's like I don't know who you are anymore and you don't know me. Everything is coming to an end. These two days didn't see you, I don't know how to describe my feeling. I was happy at first as finally I can have some time for myself, finally I can rest at home and finally I can be alone. Today it felt the same. Just I feel something's strange. Feeling weird to spend my afternoon at home. Feeling weird of doing what I used to do last time. Everything just doesn't seemed right. I don't know why, maybe it's because I'm used to spending my days with you.
I had been struggling with myself for the past few weeks. I keep thinking, what's best for both of us. What's best for you, best for me. I admit, I don't love you like I did before. I don't trust you like I used to. And I know you couldn't have loved me better since that incident. I tried to convince myself, tried to pull it back... I'm tired and I'm fed up. Today I had been cold to you, I wanted to just ignore you, yet I can't do it. Maybe you don't know me well, maybe you don't understand me yet, or maybe you've been taking me for granted, for whatever reasons that are, I'm fed up. I'm annoyed by my own attitudes. I hate myself. I hate everything. Sometimes, I hate you for being so childish and so mean. I bet you don't know the way you reply me, I hate it. When I saw how you reply others and it was so different, it's wordless to describe how i feel. What have I done? Does anyone really love me and try to understands me besides my parents?
I feel sorry towards myself, towards you, and most importantly, towards my parents. This whole year had been a busy year till I did not really spend time with my parents. I feel sorry to them. I should love them more than any others as they love me more than they love themselves. No matter who's your partner, parents should always come first.
Why I will have thought like this? I bet most of you watch 2012. You could see that the parents put their children first in everything. They are even willing to die as long as their children are safe. Come to think of it, my parents have spent half century on earth already, how long more I could talk to them, spend time with them, hang out with them, tease them, look at them, etc..? IF 2012 the day is true, maybe we will be the lucky survivors, maybe not... So try not to waste your time anymore. There's no more time.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Quote
"Life is the art of drawing sufficient conclusions from insufficient premises. "
Hence, try to draw the greatest conclusions in life. :)
Hence, try to draw the greatest conclusions in life. :)
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